This is such a beautiful article. I totally feel the same. I LOVE THINGS. But I also love peace, and I don't know how to marry the two things. It's a tricky balance!! I feel like you're getting there! Very proud of you
Oh my gosh, the tooth brushing thing completely resonates. A few years ago, my sister and I were talking and marveling over the fact that some people brush their teeth ONLY ONCE A DAY, and it wasn’t just us (that’s how we grew up). I now brush my teeth twice a day, but growing up we always brushed before bed. because, yes, we did just brush our teeth last night! And my sister told me (and somehow this blew my mind) that her husband also grew up brushing his teeth only once a day - but in the morning! Anyway, do what works for you - and a reminder (in the words of my mother in law): you only need to brush the teeth you want to keep.
I keep thinking I don’t like nuts but then I eat them and am happy about it nearly every time.
My toddler came up with this joke based on "One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue Fish" (a favorite for a while): "One goldfish, two goldfish, FART! One goldfish, two goldfish, POOP!" He laughs hysterically. Feel free to try it on T. XD
I dont care about most things and am forever giving stuff away, since it somehow just comes to us? Idk. My 4 yo started making wordplay really early and it is just fantastisc to have a kid you can crack jokes with.
Thank you always for your writing, i am always happy to find sth of yours in my inbox.
Oh my god I've never felt so...seen and understood and attacked and loved, maybe ever? In no particular order: I find brushing before and after breakfast is actually the best option. I like to brush after most meals, to be honest, and I think most people would really enjoy this if they put it into action.
The Kiziks - sneakers you put on without bending over - really are quite great, I'm sorry to say.
This all reminds me of a Substack by AHP a few years back, in which she said, and I'm paraphrasing, "You're really trying to buy a life you want to have or a person you want to be." And I know it's true and the FreeWrite did not help me write more and the tea kettle did not encourage me to have bedtime tea and the notebook did not solve my life...but the right running shoes did turn me into a runner and the light up vest does make me much more comfortable/safe walking the dogs at night and the good kitchen knife did make me like cooking better. So how will I know unless I try? This is a rhetorical question by someone who did just sign up for rock climbing lessons. And a nature writing workshop. And several full moon hikes.
This stopped me in my tracks. Holy hell, I feel SEEN. Thank you!! (And switching to paid is something I’m keeping in my to-do list, because you deserve it. If Substack allowed in-app upgrades, I’m convinced they’d have a much higher conversion rate. In any case, THANK YOU!!)
When I was 14, I decided to collect them. It was a Weird Al reference. The collection didn’t grow after I left for college, but it continues to exist. In my kitchen, there are only four.
Thank you Sophie! I loved listening while sipping my morning coffee and staring into my light therapy lamp ☀️
I brush my teeth before breakfast mainly because I often eat breakfast on the way to or at work. I’ve wondered about this before, but recently decided to let it go. Interested in hearing other’s thoughts on this!
Decluttering and getting rid of excess stuff can be so hard for me but it feels so nice to have a clean open peaceful space. I recently moved which is a great and terrible way to be confronted with all your worldly belongings. Another challenge is figuring out how those belongings fit into a new space. I feel more inspired to get rid of stuff that’s actually weighing me down. Just yesterday I listened to this podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/05-gentle-organizing-with-alison-lush/id1643931456?i=1000582860787
It was a great listen, they had some good tips and ideas about how to think about and actually declutter. Also, some permission to not feel ashamed or bad if you can’t or don’t want to get rid of some or any stuff! While still finding ways to have an organized nice space.
this is a beautiful piece on the positives of subtraction (the pluses of minus?) that i will aim not to ADD too much to in response, in part because it is very resonant to my heart and home.
this is great science to know, thank you for sharing it: "actively cutting things out of your life is more likely to improve your overall mood than adding new things into your life."
this is a wise truth, with many ripples beyond the specifics of the text: "I don’t have to sign up for a salsa class"
this is a great joke to laugh at, thank you for providing it to your child AND to all of us here (your other children?) for laughter: “A Whole Noo-Dle.”
this is a wonderful question and a fun way to ask it (especially the trees/leaves part): "What do you like to subtract? What can you? I think it’s a good time to do it. The trees are subtracting their leaves, the daylight is subtracting its hours."
i will answer with only a few things but know that there are infinite more in my life:
-- i like subtracting emails from my inbox
-- i like subtracting books from my shelf
-- i like subtracting things i could add to this list but look how good a job i did!
(Did you know AHP is also a Whittie??) Anyways, I want to read that book about maximalism now, but I think the real answer is that both adding and subtracting are delightful in their own ways, and over-embracing either is problematic. Perhaps life is meant to be lived in binge/purge cycles, adding things that delight you and getting rid of the things that no longer "spark joy" such that your life is full of things that are specific and meaningful to you, but not so full that there's not room for more such things to show up.
I brush my teeth twice per day, before I go to bed and after I wake up. It's habit that was trained into me from a young age, and even though it seems a little silly to brush my teeth first thing in the morning when I just brushed them last night and all I did was sleep and haven't eaten anything yet... I'm pretty sure trying to re-route the habit would result in its erosion, so I'll live in this rut. My dentist seems to like it. Sometimes I even throw in a 3rd toothbrushing mid-day and then I feel like a real hero.
hello I love you I needed this
This is such a beautiful article. I totally feel the same. I LOVE THINGS. But I also love peace, and I don't know how to marry the two things. It's a tricky balance!! I feel like you're getting there! Very proud of you
Loved this, but I need to ask: Is the cat on the roof alive?
OMG i'm so sorry to scare you. It is a tinsel cat. Made of tinsel. Never alive, except in our hearts.
Thank goodness!
Okay, Sophie. I was revising an article, opened Substack on my phone for a break, and saw a 13+ minute voiceover by you.
Since the title confused me, I decided to click and listen. I rarely just listen, but I did anyway.
You cracked me up, Sophie. Your extemporaneous detours during reading were so cute I wanted to squeeze your cheeks 🤗
I'm saving your post so that I can remember who you are.
BTW I'm so glad I can slow down recordings, and I usually speed them up to 2X.
No way could I speed yours up 😂
Oh my gosh, the tooth brushing thing completely resonates. A few years ago, my sister and I were talking and marveling over the fact that some people brush their teeth ONLY ONCE A DAY, and it wasn’t just us (that’s how we grew up). I now brush my teeth twice a day, but growing up we always brushed before bed. because, yes, we did just brush our teeth last night! And my sister told me (and somehow this blew my mind) that her husband also grew up brushing his teeth only once a day - but in the morning! Anyway, do what works for you - and a reminder (in the words of my mother in law): you only need to brush the teeth you want to keep.
I keep thinking I don’t like nuts but then I eat them and am happy about it nearly every time.
My toddler came up with this joke based on "One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue Fish" (a favorite for a while): "One goldfish, two goldfish, FART! One goldfish, two goldfish, POOP!" He laughs hysterically. Feel free to try it on T. XD
I'm glad you know about that empty shelf saying. I think about that frequently. Space is good for our brains.
I also have 237 spatulas, but I truly use them all the time, and I get them all dirty, and then I wish I had 238.
Perhaps you could coauthor the story of spatulas, an unappreciated utensil.
I have a bag of spatulas in my garage.
I dont care about most things and am forever giving stuff away, since it somehow just comes to us? Idk. My 4 yo started making wordplay really early and it is just fantastisc to have a kid you can crack jokes with.
Thank you always for your writing, i am always happy to find sth of yours in my inbox.
Take care and have fun!
Oh my god I've never felt so...seen and understood and attacked and loved, maybe ever? In no particular order: I find brushing before and after breakfast is actually the best option. I like to brush after most meals, to be honest, and I think most people would really enjoy this if they put it into action.
The Kiziks - sneakers you put on without bending over - really are quite great, I'm sorry to say.
This all reminds me of a Substack by AHP a few years back, in which she said, and I'm paraphrasing, "You're really trying to buy a life you want to have or a person you want to be." And I know it's true and the FreeWrite did not help me write more and the tea kettle did not encourage me to have bedtime tea and the notebook did not solve my life...but the right running shoes did turn me into a runner and the light up vest does make me much more comfortable/safe walking the dogs at night and the good kitchen knife did make me like cooking better. So how will I know unless I try? This is a rhetorical question by someone who did just sign up for rock climbing lessons. And a nature writing workshop. And several full moon hikes.
Moon hikes. Excellent decision.
I remember that AHP post — I loved it. And you’re right about the Kiziks. I bought them, I love them, they will be one of my ten things next week.
Thanks for reading and writing!
Stumbled across this e-mail, almost deleted then took a look, listened and just plain relaxed and enjoyed.
This stopped me in my tracks. Holy hell, I feel SEEN. Thank you!! (And switching to paid is something I’m keeping in my to-do list, because you deserve it. If Substack allowed in-app upgrades, I’m convinced they’d have a much higher conversion rate. In any case, THANK YOU!!)
Thank you for writing this gonna go throw everything I own away
Please share more about the spatulas. I love them and have convinced myself not to acquire more. How did you move past such a limiting decision?
When I was 14, I decided to collect them. It was a Weird Al reference. The collection didn’t grow after I left for college, but it continues to exist. In my kitchen, there are only four.
Thank you Sophie! I loved listening while sipping my morning coffee and staring into my light therapy lamp ☀️
I brush my teeth before breakfast mainly because I often eat breakfast on the way to or at work. I’ve wondered about this before, but recently decided to let it go. Interested in hearing other’s thoughts on this!
Decluttering and getting rid of excess stuff can be so hard for me but it feels so nice to have a clean open peaceful space. I recently moved which is a great and terrible way to be confronted with all your worldly belongings. Another challenge is figuring out how those belongings fit into a new space. I feel more inspired to get rid of stuff that’s actually weighing me down. Just yesterday I listened to this podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/05-gentle-organizing-with-alison-lush/id1643931456?i=1000582860787
It was a great listen, they had some good tips and ideas about how to think about and actually declutter. Also, some permission to not feel ashamed or bad if you can’t or don’t want to get rid of some or any stuff! While still finding ways to have an organized nice space.
💗”a great and terrible way to be confronted with all your worldly belongings.”
💯
I agree.
dear sophie,
this is a beautiful piece on the positives of subtraction (the pluses of minus?) that i will aim not to ADD too much to in response, in part because it is very resonant to my heart and home.
this is great science to know, thank you for sharing it: "actively cutting things out of your life is more likely to improve your overall mood than adding new things into your life."
this is a wise truth, with many ripples beyond the specifics of the text: "I don’t have to sign up for a salsa class"
this is a great joke to laugh at, thank you for providing it to your child AND to all of us here (your other children?) for laughter: “A Whole Noo-Dle.”
this is a wonderful question and a fun way to ask it (especially the trees/leaves part): "What do you like to subtract? What can you? I think it’s a good time to do it. The trees are subtracting their leaves, the daylight is subtracting its hours."
i will answer with only a few things but know that there are infinite more in my life:
-- i like subtracting emails from my inbox
-- i like subtracting books from my shelf
-- i like subtracting things i could add to this list but look how good a job i did!
thank you so much for sharing!
love
myq
Thank you Myq for commenting on this post so I could find it!
Of course! Sophie’s art and writing are super and worth knowing about so I like telling everyone!
This was such an interesting counterpoint to the interview I read RIGHT BEFORE THIS in Anne Helen Petersen's substack: https://annehelen.substack.com/p/the-opulence-and-liberation-of-maximalism
(Did you know AHP is also a Whittie??) Anyways, I want to read that book about maximalism now, but I think the real answer is that both adding and subtracting are delightful in their own ways, and over-embracing either is problematic. Perhaps life is meant to be lived in binge/purge cycles, adding things that delight you and getting rid of the things that no longer "spark joy" such that your life is full of things that are specific and meaningful to you, but not so full that there's not room for more such things to show up.
I brush my teeth twice per day, before I go to bed and after I wake up. It's habit that was trained into me from a young age, and even though it seems a little silly to brush my teeth first thing in the morning when I just brushed them last night and all I did was sleep and haven't eaten anything yet... I'm pretty sure trying to re-route the habit would result in its erosion, so I'll live in this rut. My dentist seems to like it. Sometimes I even throw in a 3rd toothbrushing mid-day and then I feel like a real hero.