"The cold doesn’t seem like it can hurt you quite so much when you are out in it, refusing to let it win."
BEAUTIFUL YAY AND YES.
Also "if you are putting all of your energy into taking care of other people, there is a good chance you’re out of touch with your own values and your self identity."
I definitely needed to hear this again (for the 8th billionth time). Thanks for the reminder.
And "You want things. There is nothing wrong with wanting things. In fact, please get clear about the things you want! Then go embody those things."
Also thank you.
And congratulations on saying yes to the 'apology loaf' (😂) and also for sending all those emails. I love your story about deciding to call yourself a cartoonist as well. And I also just read Many Love for the first time and loved it. Thank you. Good luck with all your upcoming sales — I hope you make bank!
i particularly appreciate this passage and thus cut and paste it here for more people to hopefully experience it and all the other words you write and art you share:
"I want to tell you this, because it is important: if you are putting all of your energy into taking care of other people, there is a good chance you’re out of touch with your own values and your self identity. You may have fallen into the trap of saying yes because it’s polite or kind or will help someone out. I know this, too, from experience: the people who love you want you to be in touch with yourself. They want you to take the time it takes to know the things you want, and to fully understand the person you hope to become. Take the time. It may not always feel like it, but that time belongs to you."
thanks and love,
myq
PS on the phone with my mom today, one of the first things she asked me was whether i had read your newsletter today. she had and she particularly loved it. now i have and i feel the same.
Oh, Sophie, this letter could not have come at a better time for me. I've been going through an identity crisis as it is my first year post undergrad and full time employed. Navigating this world has been strange and I am so good at forgetting past versions of me. I'm going to do some good journaling.
Also, I work as a gardener and am mostly doing fun winter arrangements of greens and such in planters for the next few weeks. I just spent 8 hours outside yesterday and firmly believe layers is the most important part of saving yourself from the cold. I wore 3 pairs of socks and boots on my feet. Two pairs of pants on my legs. 5 layers of shirts, sweatshirts, and a jacket. A hat, bandana, and hood on my head and a bandana around my neck. My toes still got cold hand to sandwich them in toewarmers in my boots which solved that.
I worked with a career coach a few years ago who started our entire process together by asking me to do a values activity -- with the goal of identifying a short list that could be memorable and serve to help with decisions/guidance in the future. I was only able to narrow it to 16 (too many to remember/be useful, as optimistic as it is!) and am wondering about revisiting the exercise with this encouragement (the line "if you are putting all of your energy into taking care of other people, there is a good chance you’re out of touch with your own values and your self identity" that everyone else has been so struck by!)
Much of this year has been about rebalancing and surviving, but I've also spent the whole year saying I wanted to leave my job. I can feel myself pressing against the comfortable edges and wondering what else is out there, if I were to try to be more aligned with my values and personality. Something I am thinking a lot about. thank you as always, sophie, for your words & your thoughts & the time and energy that you put into sharing them with all of us.
The book ornaments are really really lovely and easy to make! You can see general directions here: https://thebookcasebeauty.com/2022/11/15/book-ornament/ - I folded paper like a fan and stapled the books together rather than gluing covers to a piece of foam board. This is because I didn't like the look of the separable fallible ornaments, and you can slightly bend the folded paper to get it into a regular fill-able ornament. I also got the "flat" clear ball ornaments which are sort of disc-shaped; you're able to see the covers of the books a bit more!
"The cold doesn’t seem like it can hurt you quite so much when you are out in it, refusing to let it win."
BEAUTIFUL YAY AND YES.
Also "if you are putting all of your energy into taking care of other people, there is a good chance you’re out of touch with your own values and your self identity."
I definitely needed to hear this again (for the 8th billionth time). Thanks for the reminder.
And "You want things. There is nothing wrong with wanting things. In fact, please get clear about the things you want! Then go embody those things."
Also thank you.
And congratulations on saying yes to the 'apology loaf' (😂) and also for sending all those emails. I love your story about deciding to call yourself a cartoonist as well. And I also just read Many Love for the first time and loved it. Thank you. Good luck with all your upcoming sales — I hope you make bank!
dear sophie,
thank you for this. as always.
i particularly appreciate this passage and thus cut and paste it here for more people to hopefully experience it and all the other words you write and art you share:
"I want to tell you this, because it is important: if you are putting all of your energy into taking care of other people, there is a good chance you’re out of touch with your own values and your self identity. You may have fallen into the trap of saying yes because it’s polite or kind or will help someone out. I know this, too, from experience: the people who love you want you to be in touch with yourself. They want you to take the time it takes to know the things you want, and to fully understand the person you hope to become. Take the time. It may not always feel like it, but that time belongs to you."
thanks and love,
myq
PS on the phone with my mom today, one of the first things she asked me was whether i had read your newsletter today. she had and she particularly loved it. now i have and i feel the same.
I gasped at that paragraph. The tears are still hot on my cheeks. Thank you
Oh, Sophie, this letter could not have come at a better time for me. I've been going through an identity crisis as it is my first year post undergrad and full time employed. Navigating this world has been strange and I am so good at forgetting past versions of me. I'm going to do some good journaling.
Also, I work as a gardener and am mostly doing fun winter arrangements of greens and such in planters for the next few weeks. I just spent 8 hours outside yesterday and firmly believe layers is the most important part of saving yourself from the cold. I wore 3 pairs of socks and boots on my feet. Two pairs of pants on my legs. 5 layers of shirts, sweatshirts, and a jacket. A hat, bandana, and hood on my head and a bandana around my neck. My toes still got cold hand to sandwich them in toewarmers in my boots which solved that.
Take good care!
I worked with a career coach a few years ago who started our entire process together by asking me to do a values activity -- with the goal of identifying a short list that could be memorable and serve to help with decisions/guidance in the future. I was only able to narrow it to 16 (too many to remember/be useful, as optimistic as it is!) and am wondering about revisiting the exercise with this encouragement (the line "if you are putting all of your energy into taking care of other people, there is a good chance you’re out of touch with your own values and your self identity" that everyone else has been so struck by!)
Much of this year has been about rebalancing and surviving, but I've also spent the whole year saying I wanted to leave my job. I can feel myself pressing against the comfortable edges and wondering what else is out there, if I were to try to be more aligned with my values and personality. Something I am thinking a lot about. thank you as always, sophie, for your words & your thoughts & the time and energy that you put into sharing them with all of us.
The book ornaments are really really lovely and easy to make! You can see general directions here: https://thebookcasebeauty.com/2022/11/15/book-ornament/ - I folded paper like a fan and stapled the books together rather than gluing covers to a piece of foam board. This is because I didn't like the look of the separable fallible ornaments, and you can slightly bend the folded paper to get it into a regular fill-able ornament. I also got the "flat" clear ball ornaments which are sort of disc-shaped; you're able to see the covers of the books a bit more!